My Lumanog

My lumanog finally gave out last Friday (body tuklap-ed). Crimson was 9 years old. Was hoping I could play you under the cherry blossoms, but it was your time. My parents bought you for such a cheap price. They never thought you'd survive this long. With you, I learned to love strumming your strings and attempt to produce music. In times of despair, frustration, frustration, guilt, and heart-wrenching pain, you became the outlet of all my outbursts. You patiently endured the strain of my experimental clumsy fingers on your frets. We made sweet music and sometimes beautiful noise together. In your silence, you comforted me. Your body was a bloody shade of red and despite my fear of blood, I loved you. Your bruised side caused by Elmer accidentally kicking you while doing his robot moves reminds me of fond memories of high school. My friends (ruds, jessie, maxine, anj, josh, katz, dorcas, bry, nado) even signed the paper we used to cover up your crack. :)



I know it's strange to be this attached to a music instrument, but he comprised a huge chunk of my teen and early adult life. I'll miss playing you, old pal.

Did my cardio an hour ago. Wiped back etc., but still got some sweat on my shirt. Didn't change my shirt because well.. lazy. :D I know, I know, disgusting me yakatak yakatak blah blah blah. *sigh* sudden rush of Ms. Paran memories. LOL

Anywayyyyyyy, the sweat dried because I can't take a bath right after since I might get pasmado. Amazingly, my shirt with ALL the sweat doesn't stink at all. Either my perspiration doesn't have the slightest trace of the weird scent called BO or my shirt just smells too good.

Ooooh! Ooooh!
"Deadorant is for after the bath, not in place of it."

teehee That line makes me smile then when I remember my bros hygeine.... *barf*

1 1

Because being number 1 can be lonely.

I guess I lost another ahia too, but losing him was less painful since I've been gradually losing him for the past 5 years. Sure, he's still walking the streets of the 3rd planet from the sun, but he barely exist to me. The friendship's no longer the same, or maybe, I just placed more value on it than he did ever since. I suppose some things just end.

I'll remember the first 4 years of the friendship, the good times, but the silent years, I could do away with. You've never seen me that way, and I trusted you too much. I loved you as my best guy friend, but not anymore. Why continue lying to myself, hoping that somehow in your "busy" schedule, you could at least pretend to care.

I was wrong to hope that things didn't change.

I shed my share of tears for Ahia Lablab, but for you, it just doesn't seem worth it.

Regrets and 5-day late realizations

My cousin died on the morning of December 8, 2009.

The tears arrived late.

I miss you, Ahia Lablab. You would have made an amazing IM doctor. Can't believe you just passed the board last February.

I'm sorry I didn't get to see you when you were here. Now, you no longer know pain and suffering. I'll bawi when I see you again real soon. I'm looking forward to it, hia.

Wish/Savings List/Goal

Materialism is very un-Christian-like since we should not invest in things of the earth but instead in heavenly things because what is here and now will tarnish and fade, but what is above will be perfect forever.

Every time a friend asks me what I want for birthday or Christmas, I'm always stumped. At that very moment, I can't think of anything I desire. It's weird. I don't know if I just have short-term memory loss or I'm too contented. Leeching off others is not an admirable characteristic so unless someone offers, I dare not ask.

I'm not soooo un-human that I don't like things. I mean I do, but I tend to forget, so for my brain's sake, I just wanted to jot down a couple of stuff I want to buy, not for you to go out and look for them, but for me to save up for them. Of course, your donations would be highly appreciated. hahaha I hope God doesn't hate me too much for wanting such things.

Let's start with the simple stuff...

1. Sunglasses
Aviator or other unique shades. Believe it or not, I don't own a single pair so I'm always borrowing others, be it JK or Rudolph. Oh, and shutter and other ridiculously useless shades are out of the question.

2. Brown or Black Leather Boots
1.5 inch heels or less and the cut should be around 3 inches above the ankle. Simple, cute, and versatile.

3. Lose a whole lot of weight
Au natural. Change eating habits and move more... cardio more. Ugh... anything but jogging. I need to lose a lot, and it's actually not some anorexic attempt. I just need to lower my BMI to normal levels. Sooooo unhealthy right now.

4. Black Leather Jacket
It keeps clothes interesting.

5. BB Gun
Whether it be a pistol or rifle, I don't mind. It would give me a (false) sense of security. A real gun is too expensive and dangerous. Maybe next time.

6. LiveStrong band
Lance Armstrong's band represent those battling cancer. Many people wearing it probably don't even know what it stands for. They just bought it because it was part of some fadding fad. I want to buy one because it's actually related to what I do, and that band would help remind me who would benefit from that research. That the long nights in the lab weren't for a hopeless cause.

7. Condo
I love living in the South. Like Pastor Nathan said, there's a breeze here, and I love the serenity living here brings. You breathe less polluted air, and it's far from the extreme hustle and bustle that the "city" brings. It's relatively safer since I live in a village within a village, but the travel time from UP to my house is unbearable especially since I have to commute. Sometimes I leave school at 9 and get home at nearly midnight, so I want to get a condo or apartment somewhere in Makati or Ortigas, so it's somehow equidistant from UP and home. Either that or temporarily live in a condo/dorm in Diliman. But the Makati confo is my goal. That and a house here in the South, so I can come home every weekend and enjoy the wondrous joy living here brings.

8. Car
A Lamborghini or Ferrari would be my total dream, but that might be too "maluho", so on to my next dream, Chevrolet Camaro (decked out Bumblebee-style) or Mazda MX-5. *drools* This worldliness is getting to me. LOL Actually, for starters, I just want a simple car that can run, is very fuel-efficient or non-fuel dependent at all (all for the green revolution), and has a functional radio and air-con. I'd need this when I travel from north to south during weekends. haha

9. Laser
Hair removal. Waxing and plucking are such hassles. LOL Sorry, I'm so disgusting. :))

10. Bleach
My arms have suffered years of sun-exposure due to all the outdoorsy studies and semi-hikes being a Biology undergrad student brings, so my arms (and legs - slight haha) have be brutally sacrificed. The color of my appendages are 4 shades darker than my back. o.o Fine, I need to lighten my face too. First line of defense ba naman sa sun. :|

11. Chromosome 1 Shirt
It's being offered by Science.org and I want it sooooo bad. My geekiness is calling out to it. The shirt's like more than 1000php plus shipping so I can't exactly afford it, and it wouldn't be right to spend so much on just a shirt, so if someone happens to be in the US and find it, um.. gift? hahahaha

12. Marshmallow berret
It's being offered by someone on multiply. It's so kawaii. White bow and everything.

13. Donate 1M
That's something I kinda got from my dad. I guess he's not all that bad. He used to say that he wished that someday he could write a check of that amount to donate, whether it be a church, ministry, or street children. He hasn't done it yet, but it has become my goal too. And not just that, I want to have a sacrificaly generous heart that would be able to give anytime anyone had the need. I haven't been that giving yet, and I'm hoping God would help me be that way someday, especially when I'm earning much more than I am today. I pray that my heart not be filled with greed, but that as my blessings increase, so do my givings.

Barfing albumin

Extremely weird experience last Sunday (Nov 29).

WARNING: Do not read if you can't handle slightly repulsive descriptions of bodily fluids and illness-related events.

I was coughing non-stop and was on the verge of vomiting with each cough, so I had to keep running to the bathroom. Ugh... I tried my best not to cough in church, but, alas, it was hopeless. 45 minutes into the service, the sticky feeling in the pit of my throat just wouldn't go away, so I had to go visit the sacred room and barf away.

Once I got home, still sticky and coughing. My eyes were tearing up due to the increasing intensity of coughs, but what else could I do? Refuse to cough? LOL Anyway, around 7pm, the coughing was abnormally frequent and painful and icky. I felt a sudden surge of fluid run up my esophagus, so I started running to the bathroom, trying hard to hold it in, but, sadly, it became one of my most embarrassing moments that thankfully no one got to see. Five steps away from the basin, I spew out this weird clear sticky substance that can be best descibed as egg white-like. I tried to hold it in my hands, but some of it fell on the floor. The rest of it came out in the basin. When I was cleaning up the mess I caused, I noticed the viscosity of the susbtance I had just expeled. It was beyond the typical phlegm. It was clear, held some sort a shape, just like albumin from freshly laid eggs. The watery counterpart fell in the basin.

It just baffled me. I wanted to take a sample for analysis, but even I thought that would just be way too bizzarre. Might have been partially due to the "saluyot" I ate for lunch. (Boiling saluyot results in a liquid with a texture similar to that produced by okra)

After the incident, my throat felt relieved. All the sticky feeling was gone. I was left with dry cough.

That incident will forever have a special place in my memories though. Barfing albumin.